Question: Fighting Porn For The Last Time (Again)


Two anonymous questions:

Did you ever stumble after you decided to quit porn? or was it like going cold turkey? & what happens if you do stumble? does that mean that you’ve failed?

And:

I know you posted a whole series on the topic, but…I feel like I need to hear it from you – how to stop looking at pornography. I know I want to get it out of my life. I am serious about that. But when that temptation comes, the moment is just so intense and I know that there’s a way out but it feels like I just end up functioning on autopilot. Open up a website, click a few links, feel shame seconds after. I need this gone from my life. It’s wrecking me.

For a refresher, here’s the multi-post series on Porn Addiction.  It’s very long and involved, and emerged out of much personal struggling with my 15 year addiction.

 Here are also more specific questions asked previously:

 

Just used porn, what do I do?

Porn killed my feelings for God, now what?

So Porn Is A Sin?

Quit porn, but what about masturbating?

 

As of today, I haven’t masturbated to porn (or without porn) for 265 days.  I’ve looked at porn maybe twice in that time but shut it down pretty quick.  I can’t say that I’ve “beaten lust” or remained totally pure, but as far as porn addiction goes, it’s further and further in my rearview.  There CAN be victory.

Please know that my heart grieves for you when I say this, and I got nothing but love for you, but you absolutely cannot be lukewarm about this whole thing.  If you’re 98% serious about it, then forget it.  As long as it remains some kind of option for you, you’ll go back to it again and again. 

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Five Truths On Trials — When Life Hits Back


Image by Rob Connelly – Copyrighted

I started a sermon series last Sunday on enduring through hard times (you can check it here), and wanted to share some of those truths on trials.

1) A trial is a specific season of suffering that God allows for your good and His Glory. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8, 7:13-14

God has preordained everything before creating time and the universe and you.  He knew we would give Him the middle finger, so He had in mind the sending of His Son to die on a cross in our place. This wasn’t a back-up plan, but The Plan.

God also had in mind specific seasons of your life, some good and some tough.  Ninety-nine percent of life is what happens to you.  The 1% is how you respond, to both the good and the bad.

Note that a trial is a season, and it WILL pass.  You can come out of a trial better or bitter, and that will determine how you handle the next season.  If you’re not humble in the trials, you won’t exactly enjoy the good seasons either.  If you’re humble, you’ll thank God for both.

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Question: Why Christianity?

thevalidfallacy asked:
If you were a former atheist/agnostic, that meant you did not believe in god or any religion that supported a god. Why did you go back to Christianity, and not choose another religion that supported a belief in a higher being? How is Christianity superior to other religions that led you to take up the religion?

Thanks for your honest question. I checked out your blog, and you appear to be smart, well-informed, educated, and with a sharp cool streak running in your veins.  Not empty flattery here, but I recognize you’re not out to attack, and I respect your curiosity to reach out.

I’m well aware that I couldn’t possibly give you an answer that would somehow satisfy you without offending you, that would quench your intellect while at the same time appearing reasonable to your worldview. Particularly online, when words can be misconstrued and sentences can be analyzed word for word, where no one can possibly hope to convince (or even gently suggest) anyone towards anything else than their currently held paradigm, it is in all futility that I answer as humbly as I can.

Truthfully: I struggle to believe, I don’t have it all figured out or together, and some days I do feel this is all crazy.  I confess with great frustration that I sometimes long for the atheist worldview again, as if this were a simpler Occam’s Razor solution to a seemingly meaningless existence on our chemical continuum. 

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Begging For Retroactive Grace: When You Realize You Were The Stumbling Block

I haven’t lived a very good life.

I know that in the eyes of Christ, because I believe who he is and what he has done, that I’m forgiven for it. But that doesn’t change the horrible ideas I’ve embedded in innocent minds, the trail of destruction I left behind, the blasphemous garbage from this mouth that has thrown people off a brighter path.

I have God’s grace, but I beg Him for grace upon others I screwed up.

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$10,000

Update on this post about donating half of my salary away.

Hello, friends!

First of all, thank you to the dozens of people who have shown support and encouragement.

Thanks to my friend Christine for sending me a $100 Starbucks gift card.

Thanks also to my mom, who is not a Christian, who lovingly understands what I’m trying to do.

After some discussions and ruminating, I thought I would be a little smarter about it.

- Each month I’ll put $900 or more in savings.

- This will accrue at least a little interest.

- At the end of the year, I’ll have at least $10,000.

- Over the year I’ll pray about an awesome charity.

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Extended Hiatus



Hello friends!

Due to the return of migraines and an increasingly busy summer schedule, I’ll be taking an extended hiatus from blogging. I’ll continue to answer questions at least a few times a week, plus the occasional post here and there. I’ll also post Flashbacks, which are links to previous blog posts. And even if I don’t click “like” or comment, I’ll still be catching up with your blogs.

I humbly ask for your prayers in this time.

Thank you and love you guys.
– J.S.

Quote: No Longer


“Every good thing we could think or desire is to be found in this same Jesus Christ alone. For, He was sold, to buy us back; captive, to deliver us; condemned, to absolve us; He was made a curse for our blessing, sin offering for our righteousness; marred that we may be made fair; he died for our life; so that by Him fury is made gentle, wrath appeased, darkness turned into light, fear reassured, despisal despised, debt canceled, labor lightened, sadness made merry, misfortune made fortunate, difficulty easy, disorder ordered, division united, ignominy ennobled, rebellion subjected, intimidation intimidated, ambush uncovered, assaults assailed, force forced back, combat combated, war warred against, vengeance avenged, torment tormented, damnation damned, the abyss sunk into the abyss, hell transfixed, death dead, mortality made immortal. In short, mercy has swallowed up all misery, and goodness all misfortune. For all these things which were to be weapons of the devil in his battle against us, and the sting of death to pierce us, are turned for us into exercises which we can turn to our profit. If we are able to boast with the Apostle, saying, O hell, where is thy victory? O death, where is thy sting? It is because by the Spirit of Christ, we live no longer, but Christ lives in us.”

– John Calvin


Quote: Shudder


“The universe shudders in horror that we have this infinitely valuable, infinitely deep, infinitely rich, infinitely wise, infinitely loving God, and instead of pursuing him with steadfast passion and enthralled fury — instead of loving him with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength; instead of attributing to him glory and honor and praise and power and wisdom and strength — we just try to take his toys and run. It is still idolatry to want God for his benefits but not for himself. Why would the universe shudder in horror at this idea? … It shudders because the universe is the theater of God’s glory and the Scriptures portray this theater as having the instinct itself that it is there to showcase worship. When we, who have been placed as stewards over God’s creation, go rogue and worship not the Creator but the creation, the theater is shaken by this blasphemous treason.”

– Matt Chandler

Question: The Christian Life Is Just Change, Or More?

Anonymous asked:
How can you tell when you’re actually living out your faith? Is it simply the fruits of the spirit gradually becoming apparent in your daily routine or does it look more radical?

So it looks we’ve set up a conflict here between fruits and radical living.  In other words: Is the Christian life just about personal holiness?  Or should I be fighting crime and rescuing slaves and beating up dictators?

Let’s be clear: The American church absolutely loves the whole personal holiness thing.  Almost every Christian book in your bookstore is about transformation, renewing your mind, a better you, “Gospel Centrality,” fixing your heart, tending to your emotions, and a bunch of other self-involved disciplines.  Not all these are bad, but the focus is obvious. 

Even missional work in America is considered a personal holiness thing.  I’ve heard it preached, “In the end you’ll grow closer to God and see what He’s doing for you.”  Again, not really wrong, but you see the implication.

We’ve very much disconnected God’s saving grace with His call to glorify His name.  When we stick a wedge between Grace and Glory, we’ve lost the Gospel. A lot of theologians want to set up Jesus and Paul like they were saying different things, but NO, they were not.  Jesus and Paul would both say Jesus is both the Gate and the Road.

I’ll put it simply, in sort of a rhyme:

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Quote: Well


“Now, you need more motivation? Because if you do, you’re lost. If you need me to tell you that if you serve God you’ll get a Mercedes, you’re lost. If you need me to tell you that if you serve God He will heal your body and fix everyone of you’re problem, if you need that, you’re lost. If Jesus is not enough to motivate you to live a godly life, you don’t know Jesus. So let us keep it simple: Christ and Christ alone, no one else. I have need of nothing else. It is well with my soul.”

– Paul Washer

“The Holiness of God”



God is a holy, holy, holy god. He does have the freedom to judge you however He wants to. I don’t care how much you feel something, desire something, believe God ought to do something a certain way. He’s not bound to your feelings, your notions, your opinions. He doesn’t care what [I] conjure up in my head of what I think ought to be right or ought to be wrong. He says, ‘You’re not God. I am. And here’s what I say is right and wrong.’

It doesn’t matter that you say, ‘He has no right to punish me. He has no right to have this type of wrath. Or a loving God can’t create a place of punishment.’ You need to understand: God does whatever He wants to do, and it’s not about you. Maybe you’ve lived this weird Disney Land life where people bow down to you and really care about your opinion. That’s not the way God is. I don’t care how powerful you are. I don’t care how much money you have. I don’t care how good you look. I don’t care how popular you think you are. You’re nothing. I’m nothing in the presence of God. … But because of the blood of Christ, He calls me His child.

– Francis Chan

The Holiness Of God (April 25th, 2010)

Probably the most straight-up thing he has ever said.


Question: Why Shouldn’t I Worry?

Anonymous asked:
Hey can you tell me about worry like why should we as Christians not worry.

Well first please allow me the shameless self-promoting humility to offer up two sermons I did on that:

The Crazy You Secured In Christ, Part 4 – Don’t Worry About It

The Crazy You Secured In Christ, Part 3 – Everything’s Going To Be All Right

Some reasons not to worry then:

1) God is in control of everything.

You’ve heard this before, but worry assumes that God is not in control of a few things, which implies that He’s not in control of anything.  I don’t want to be the fool that puts in Him that position, since I don’t like the taste of lightning either. 

Deadlines, traffic, your relationship, the economy, the cancer, your mortgage, your kids, death, world hunger, your computer files — ALL these things are in control by an all-knowing God.  Nothing happens without His stamp of approval, and if you believe God is good and He loves you, then you know He’s got this. He’s got an end in mind. Trust Him about that.  If you don’t think God is good nor loving, then we’re not talking about God, but just an idolatrous version of God.  Worry about that first.

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Overcoming Emotions: Sermon Series on Victory In What You Feel

The six part series on Overcoming Emotions is now completely posted on the podcast!

Overcoming Emotions: Victory In What You Feel.
An expository series through why God made us with emotions and how it’s for our good and His Glory.

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Question: I Like My Pastor But Not The People

Anonymous asked:
I’m impressed by your blog. I haven’t been impressed by a fellow Christian in a while. I grew up in church and still go every Sunday, and I was in a Christian school for twelve years. I know I’m a Christian, but yet I feel this disconnect with me and the church. I still believe the Bible, I still work with my relationship with Christ, but I still feel this disconnect. I connect to my pastor’s sermons, but not with the people, if anything I hate being around them. Any advice?

Thank you first of all for your kind words.  I really think you over-shot there (I’m hardly impressive in real life) but I’ll take it.

On that note: Where have you been all my life? Let’s hug this out bro.  What you’re feeling sounds exactly like what you should be feeling. You’re just being honest about it.  You’re the one in the class who’s raising their hand and asking, “Am I the only one who thinks we got all this wrong?” 

Let’s see: You believe the Bible, you got it going on with Jesus, you’re attending church, and you’re hearing out the sermons. That at least tells me you’re taking things seriously.  Your major itch is with the people and the weirdness at church.  Sounds like the growing pains of a Christian to me.

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Quote: Happy


“Romans 12:15 says, ‘Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.’ So if your friend gets a job, don’t be telling them how hard it’s going to be and how much they’ll hate their boss and how they need to save their money. Just be happy for them, bro. And if someone calls you and says their dad just got cancer, don’t try to crack some sitcom joke. Don’t give them a theology lesson on pain. Don’t tell them about the car you just bought. Go pick them up in your new car and let them scream and cry and vent.”


Question: Christianity and Psychology Can Reconcile?

joshtheyipper asked:
How valuable is understanding psychology in living a Christian life? Like, how much does it help us understand ourselves? Is the modern understanding of psychology valid (say, as opposed to pop-psychology)?

I’ve had this conversation plenty of times and it appears to be endless.  I’ll break it down as easy as I can.


1) Secular psychology is useful for diagnostics and research.

While I absolutely believe Scripture is the highest court of authority as God’s sufficient powerful revelation, both for salvation and wisdom, there are “lower courts” of authority worth a listen.

Psychology says some whacky things about the human condition, particularly the causes and solutions.  But two things in psychology are helpful: diagnoses and research. 

While certain diagnostic labels like “bipolar” or “manic depressive” are shotgun phrases that cover a lot of things (most psychologists still can’t agree on definitions), it’s a good starting place to know how you’re diving in.  Psychologists speak a specific language that others can pick up on, sort of a shorthand for an array of issues.  So at least upfront, the vocabulary helps.

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